8.01.2006

thoughts and wonders

I've had a few things on my mind lately.
A. W. Tozer said, "What comes to our mind when we think about Christ is the most important thing about us". Stop for a minute, think about that for a minute.
What are the acceptable thoughts?
Are there unacceptable thoughts?
And more importantly, why is it so important what my thoughts are?
When I wake up in the morning my thoughts are...."uh....shower?"
When I call home to my parent's my thoughts are...."what's cooking?"
When I start my work day my thoughts are probably..."yumm, this coffee tastes good! or hmmm, who emailed me today?"
I suppose these first thoughts describe a little bit of who I am, but are they vitally important to my identity? Maybe. But why are my thoughts about God so.....so much more significant?

Let me interrupt here to say that I don't have an answer to this quite yet so don't expect some profound ending to this blog post:)

When I'm angry with God, it's hard for me to accept the fact that those are "bad" thoughts. Nor do I believe that this mars my soul. Anger is an honest emotional reaction isn't it?
When I'm confused about God, I believe that's okay too.
I suppose I'd like to say that ANY and ALL thoughts about God are important because they are thoughts extending beyond yourself and reaching towards a bigger picture.
I was twisting the question around and asking myself a different question: "What would I want my first thoughts to look like?" Gosh, I'm not sure I have an answer. No matter how long I toss the question around, I come back to this simple rule.......I HAVE TO BE HONEST!

I wonder if maybe these thoughts ABOUT God are actually directly connected to the way that we view God. And if this is the case, then my irritated thoughts are only reflecting a faulty perspective. Am I wrong to own this faulty perspective? Or should I rather disown it immediately and adopt a better view? But how can I do that if I don't understand?

What if Mr. Tozer is not suggesting that any of these thoughts are necessarily "good" or "bad" but rather a straight honest reflection of the soul, and identifying them is the first step towards connecting with God on whatever level we are able?
What if God actually takes joy in the fact that I'm sticking out my tongue at him...just because I'm being bold enough to rebel?
What if my insecure thoughts about faith and truth are actually treasured in God's eyes because I'm trying to find something solid and lasting?

I'm curious to know what other people think, and very curious to hear answers from people who would disagree with A. W. Tozer.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...
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Stacey said...

Note: This is a test of the emergency blogging system. This is only a test! If this were a real emergency we would all be hitting the floors and running for cover!
....But wer'e not! :)

Anonymous said...

I wholeheartedly agree with Tozer on this one. Maybe that's not what you'd like to hear, oh well!

Our first thought when we hear or read "Jesus Christ" reveals how we reference Him. And how we reference Christ is indicative of the nature of our relationship with Him.

If our gut reaction to "Jesus Christ" is anger, then no matter what secondary thoughts we may have, our base relationship with Christ consists of anger.

If our gut reaction is fear, or love, the same applies. Everything else that comes to mind after the fact shapes and forms that relationship, but the first reaction is definitive.

The acceptability of your reaction is, I think, a non issue. It is what it is. What is important, is that you own it for what it is. When you're angry with God, you can't lie and say that you're happy with God, and expect any good to come from it.

We grow when we accept where we are. Only then can the Spirit work in us His good and perfect will.
--James